Great piece of advice here in a Philadelphia column - Ask Amy: The role of Dad versus Step-Dad and what to tell the kids - Mom's telling girl a lie: She has two dads.

I've been both a father and step-father. The greatest honour in my life was when my stepson Luc began calling me Dad. However I always made him know that he had a father and that his Dad, Roy was an important figure in his life.

Roy often referred to me as Dad to Luc. "Luc you listen to your Dad, Danny..." Roy and I rarely had problems with each other because we respected each other and our roles in Luc's life. We did not make it any harder for him.

When Luc's mother and I separated, Luc came with me from age 9 to 14. I have always considered him my son, and I treat him exactly like I treat his sister Elyenne.
When Luc's mother and I separated, Roy took me out for a beer. He told me he always knew this day would come ;-) I asked Roy how he felt about Luc staying with me, instead of going with Mom. He was more than OK with it.

Now that's trust. And it’s the way it should be. Roy felt that Luc would be better off with me and Luc's sister Elyenne.

The next five years I was a stay at home dad and went back to school to certify as a law clerk and open the doors to Fathers Resources International...we've helped a lot of dads since to learn from the lessons I have learned that there is the law, and there is what people will do.
While the law is a necessity to keep order and civilization intact, what people do is and will always be far more powerful...